Creating a Coping Plan To Support Your Child With Medical Procedures
When kids experience a medical procedure, it is pretty easy for them to feel scared and out of control. Sometimes it can feel so discouraging to have a bad medical experience and then it feels like you are in an endless maze that it is difficult to find the exit. Recently, I had the privilage of recording a podcast with two awesome moms that started a foundation called Charlotte’s Hope Foundation. They started this foundation to support parents navigating having a child with medical complexities as they both have a child born with a rare medical diagnosis. To say these two women are amazing is an understatement. If you are a parent or caregiver of a child with medical complexities, lean into people or organizations like Charlotte’s Hope Foundation. Through their own medical journeys with their children, they have found hope and connection and they are here to support you through your own journey. After speaking with Charlotte’s Hope Foundation, it made me think about how overwhelming a diagnosis can be as a parent, especially painful medical procedures.
Sometimes learning how to cope with medical procedures develops in the middle of a medical journey. This might be after you have been able to wrap your mind around your child’s diagnosis and the implications of this diagnosis. Maybe your child started their medical procedures as an infant and now they are getting older and you are ready to support their coping and understanding. Possibly you are reading this and you don’t have a child with medical complexities, but your child has needed vaccinations, blood draws, or dental procedures. A coping plan will help your child too. I have had the privilage of walking along families in various parts in their medical journeys. There have been successes and failures. One thing that I think is important to know as a parent, you are truly not alone. If your child has trouble coping, there are child life specialists in the hospital to help you and your child cope. More and more, you can find community-based child life practices (that’s me!). I am here to give the same message that Charlotte’s Hope Foundation gives, you are not alone.
Your child CAN develop skills to cope, but it might just take them time. There are a lot of things kids cannot control when they need a medical procedure, but there are ways to give control. One way is to create a coping plan. It streamlines communication to best support your child and it offers your child choices. It also can guide how you prepare your child for a procedure. It is meant to help the child decide their preferences for the procedures and, in turns, helps them know what to except. A phrase I say often is “you don’t have a choice to get the procedure, but you can have a lot of other choices so that you feel comfortable and confident.” Some children’s hospitals may even be able to put your child’s coping plan or poke plan into the EMR for providers to access.
Here are some items to add to your coping plan:
Identify positioning of the procedure
Sit or lay on a parent’s lap, sit next to a parent with an arm wrapped around their shoulders, holding a hand, sitting on a table by themself, etc. You can get pretty creative with positioning. If you have the luxery of time, it’s nice to practice this before the procedure.
Here is a fantastic resource for comfort positions: Meg Foundation and Child Life On Call Comfort Position Guide
If you’re in the hospital, you can ask if a treatment room is available. Your child can choose to do the procedure in their hospital room or the treatment room.
Have your child pick procedure preferences to help cope with the procedure
Do they want to watch or look away?
Sidenote, if any nurses happen to come by my humble blog, I have a request. Please do not tell a child right before you’re about to do something painful to look away. That small statement can send an alert that something scary is about to happen and cause unnessary panic.
Would like they like staff to count to 3 before the painful part of the procedure or just do it right after cleaning the procedure site?
What would like they to do to cope with any painful parts of the procedure?
Deep breaths, hold someone’s hand, listen to music, talk about something, etc.
It can be helpful to practice this coping technique outside of the painful procedure to better access it during the procedure.
Identify if they would like to do something for distraction during the procedure.
I always like something that is an active form of distraction. Options are: looking at a seek and find book, playing a game on a device, fidget toy, listen to music, etc.
If there are other pain management techniques: EMLA cream, j-tip, freeze spray, buzzy, etc.
These are all ways to facilitate control during a medical procedure. Identifying your child’s coping technique and giving them time to understand the procedure and what is expected during the procedure can be so helpful to encourage positive coping skills. If your child has trouble coping, it may take multiple positive experiences to really start to cope well with medical procedures. It is also important to validate feelings and worries, while also holding boundaries to have medical procedures completed. I have personally seen kids thrive when they have had the chance to be empowered with coping tools and supportive adults.
Would you like to hear more? Check out the Empowered By Hope Podcast as I speak to the founders of Charlotte’s Hope about coping with painful medical procedures. You can listen here or on your preferred podcast streaming app: Bridge to Bravery – Learn how a Child Life Specialist can Empower Both You & Your Child.
I do have to mention, I state in the podcast that you need a master’s degree in child life. That was the way I became a child life specialist, but you do not need a masters degree. You do need a bachelor’s degree and an internship. You can find information about how to become a child life specialist here: How to become a CCLS.
If you would like me to create a coping plan for your child, please reach out to discuss how I could help you with this process. Please contact me for your free consult today!
You can check out these links to visit my Etsy account for a printable coping plan or a customizable coping plan.